


The Best of Us

by When_Elle_MetFanfiction



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Conversations, Could Be Canon, F/M, Flashbacks, Grief/Mourning, Love Confessions, Old Friends, One Shot, Post-Season/Series 05 Finale, References to Depression, Reminiscing, Short One Shot, Wishful Thinking
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-25
Updated: 2020-03-25
Packaged: 2021-03-01 00:41:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,530
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23316334
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/When_Elle_MetFanfiction/pseuds/When_Elle_MetFanfiction
Summary: This is a scene I sat up writing about after I watched a new video posted by TeamHodgins (Bellamy & Clarke | If The World Was Ending); please go and check it out because its so good.I couldn't get the idea that, with the spread of all the theories of flashbacks to post season 5 that maybe we would get one where we see the beginning of the 6 years, where every member of Sky Cru was depressed and that Bellamy suffering from the loss of Clarke felt the worst. This is where my mind led me in the end. It's not polished because I wanted to get it out before the release of the last season which I'm so excited for.So I hope you enjoy just a glimpse into what could, in a perfect world, happen.
Relationships: Bellamy Blake & Clarke Griffin, Bellamy Blake/Clarke Griffin
Kudos: 18





	The Best of Us

It had been weeks since they had left the earth's surface and travelled up into space, securing the passage of the ring. Something the majority of the group thought they had left for good. It was becoming a sinking reminder of all the things they now missed on earth, from the lack of places to go and eventual run in with another person. 

They all mourned someone. For Monty, it was Jasper. For Raven, Fin even after all this time. Only now did she have the chance to sit down and think about him properly. 

Bellamy. Bellamy was in the worst pain imaginable. His sister, living with himself after all this. Clarke. 

Thinking of her name alone brought tears to his eyes and could only quell them when he'd balled his hands into fists for a few minutes. 

They all wanted to be alone with their thoughts; to be allowed to be swallowed up by them. Monty's eventual optimism wouldn't allow it. He let them wallow (and even himself at times) for the majority of the day excluding breakfast and dinner. (There wasn't enough 'food' to go around for everyone 3 times a day so they made do with what they could). At these times they would crowd together at one of the cold metal lunch tables and eat in silence, just baring to get through the meal without causing a scene from unnecessary anger and frustration. Monty and Harper would try speaking about certain subjects to allow the others to jump in when they wanted to. Sometimes a few of them would speak, but with little passion for the subject. Raven would eventually say something clever but sarcastic and Murphy at times would turn it into a game of provocation, often attempting to get a rise out of one of them and then smile bitterly to himself. 

It didn't matter anyway. The people they had cared about were now dead, they were here and they had 5 more years of this. 

The others in the group had picked their area of the ring to hibernate in for that time, as had Bellamy who'd found a small area that he felt comfortable nestled inside of, with a large glass panel that displayed the earth as it was now. A mess of yellows, reds and oranges. A fire poured upon the earth. Everyone down there, not covered by a mass of earth and heavy metal, was dead and burnt alive if they hadn't already killed themselves first. _Had she burned or?_ It hurt Bell physically to simply think about it. 

No one disturbed Bellamy or each other. No one was in the mood for retaliation amongst themselves. Only, Monty was now perching down on the shallow ledge cradling the glass panel, watching Bellamy watch the flaming earth. They sat there in silence for a while before, 

“I’m not in the mood,” was muttered in a low grumbled voice by Bellamy. Bellamy was taken aback by the gruffness of his unused voice. 

_Had it already been_ that _long without speaking?_

“I just thought you could use some company. Harper’s getting a bit sick of me talking her ear off. I think she wanted to be left alone a little while like all of you,” Monty sighed, “I guess we all deal with grief differently.” 

At that, Bellamy turned his head, sharpening the edges of his eyes ever so slightly. 

“I’m fine.” 

“Yeah.” Monty persisted, “I’m sure you’re probably fine. If you, umm, ever need to talk though, I understand and, I’m here.” 

Bellamy levelled his eyesight and attention back on that ball of flame again, and after a few minutes Monty gradually sighed and beginning to stretch his legs and leave the room, Bellamy’s voice played out again, more brash and cold than before. 

“What makes you think I need anyone to talk to? Huh?” 

Monty turned and examined Bellamy’s face, and upon inspection found nothing but rage directed towards him. Monty observed that Bellamy hadn’t taken any action to stand though, and his legs were still planted to the floor and arms still in his lap. 

Monty made the move to come back into the room a few steps. Bellamy continued on, 

“The rest of this damn ship isn’t talking. No one’s talking to each other,” he breathed out a shallow laugh, “and you’re the one asking me to help you by talking. By helping me somehow. We all know you want things to be like they were before, and we all do, trust me, but that’s not how things work. You of all people should know that. Jasper’s not showing up for you and Clarke isn’t —” 

Monty approached closer, deferring the blow of Jasper while touching a hand to Bellamy’s shoulder, before sitting down parallel to him. When he looked over at Bellamy again, the tilt of his head towards where Monty’s hand had rested for a moment caused a small tear to fall into his grey t-shirt. 

“I’m sorry,” Bellamy started. Monty raised his hands in an act to say ‘no need’ but didn’t in fear that _this_ Bellamy would retreat. 

“I just don’t like thinking about all of their faces and the fact that we aren’t going to see them again. I mean, what if I forget?” Bellamy murmured with genuine panic, 

“or what if I _never_ forget? And I become like them, lost to the past?” 

After a few moments, a steady stream of tears were appearing down Bell’s face, 

“She _left_ me. She left me here, alone. I can't think of a time before that she wasn’t stood beside me.” 

“I understand,” Monty quietly spoke, “I knew Jasper long before The Hundred. Since kids.” 

Monty began to smile, allowing himself to think of the time that Jasper had spotted those silly goggles and purchased them with the credits he was meant to be using to buy supplies for his mother. 

At seeing the delicacy of Monty’s smile, Bellamy began one too. 

“I think I’m mostly angry. At the world for taking her from me and angry at myself.” 

“Don’t think—” Monty started. 

“I was angry at her for wanting to do the decent thing; letting others survive. She never even got to say goodbye to her mom.” A breathy laugh escaped his lips as his eyes became more intense, “the last words I said to her were ‘you too’. Nothing at all meaningful. Not ‘I’ll see you soon’ or ‘I’ll miss you’—,” Bellamy’s speech was beginning to speed up now and becoming louder, and Monty was internally debating letting him continue or interrupting, hoping for him to calm down, “Not a ‘may we meet again’ or even an ‘I love you’. She’s just gone and I’m never going to be able to say anything other than ‘you too’ again.” 

It took a few moments but Bellamy was starting to calm down, his breathing deepening and his back starting to arch in an attempt to relax slightly. Monty was still processing what Bellamy had just unintentionally admitted to him, although it had felt like something Bellamy hadn’t allowed _himself_ to admit until now. 

Aloud at least. 

Bellamy had started to sit up straighter again, shaking off one feeling for another, a thought playing at the edges of mind. He lowered his head a bit, letting out a large grin in the process. His eyes were still cloudy, only now some exuberance could be seen behind them as well. 

“You know, she told me just before we came up here that at the beginning of all this, she didn’t like me,” Bellamy was chuckling now, and Monty was starting to suspect that above the grief, the loneliness was getting to him a tad. 

“I had to agree, at the time,” Bellamy had a large grin plastered to his face as he slowly murmured something that made the smile ever larger. Monty couldn’t understand what he had said, but it sounded like ‘brave princess’. _That couldn’t be right,_ Monty acknowledged. 

“But … God did she make me smile. I thought she’d be a pain in my ass. Some of the time she was. Only, in the end, she became the person I relied on, the person whose approval I needed the most.” 

Monty moved his head to motion a sincere heartfelt nod. 

“Clarke was the honest to God, best thing that ever happened to me. I didn’t think I’d find that in anyone but O. I didn’t deserve one bit of her.” Bellamy paused for a second, his eyes moving around to different points of the dim room. 

“I loved her Monty. She was the best of us, and she deserved so much more than she got. I should be down there with her.” 

Monty took a moment to think about this, the natural rise of tears building up in Bellamy’s eyes enough to cause Monty to speak concisely. 

“It wasn’t hard to tell that you must have loved her. She fought for what was right and what she loved and that was to save us. To save you.” 

Bellamy gave away a small smile. Monty continued now, 

“the best you can do _now_ is to simply live for her".

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoyed this. If you liked it, make sure to leave a kudos and a small comment about how I could do better, if it was at all good, and if you would like me to write anything else in the future.  
> Thanks :)


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